I cannot keep to the timetable
Routine, schedule elude me
Untimely
I have no sense of it anymore
I inhale
I exhale
Each one is a check for an invisible enemy
Unchecked
It will find me
In the light
In the dark
There is no hiding
I cannot hide
It is not like that
I disappear
I turn out the light
But it makes no difference
I drink coffee
I eat chocolate
Jam, cheese
I make sure I can taste
I can taste
Distasteful
I am not distasteful
I have not washed
It is not lost on me
That I have not lost my sense of smell
The strange nervousness in my tummy
Is that nausea
I go to the bathroom
I look at the soap
How can I ever have enough soap again?
Unclean, I am unclean
Hand sanitizer!
I dream of such things
Little bottles of
Blue and green and pink
As I lie in the darkness
Delighted
It is the middle of the night
So dark
I stand up
Bones ache and creak
I should wash my hair
Or at the very least comb it
Uncombed
Uncombed hair is not a symptom
Somewhere out there once
I was in control
You will thrive in this
If you,
If you what
Unthrive
Is not a word
What does thrive even mean?
Uncontrolled, I am not controlled
I have the remote
As I slump on the couch
In front of another nature documentary
As if the answer can be found in pictures
I go to bed again
Untired,
Untethered
More untethered than yesterday
I have not washed my pyjamas
This month, not once
I am untravelled
I no longer take the train
It is a blessing
The seats had fleas
I think I might have head lice
The poor things will die
There is no other head to pass them on to
Deliced
I feel bad for the lice
I am luckier the most
I tell my tired and drawn face
As I dawdle quietly
Obscured from the view of the world
Unclear
I blur
Into another day, another night
Unlucky, lucky, unlucky
I think this thing is just a lottery
As I stare down the darkness at 2am
Ungrateful
Even then
For a full belly and a soft bed.
I scratch my head
I wait
Unabated, unhinged, unslept,
Until
Finally,
Eventually,
Unawake.
If you like it hit the button and share
A Tuesday Latte 